Looking forward at tomorrow is a strange experience. I hope this list will provide you with what a professor once described as maximum insight density.

Seldom have I enumerated the differences between what today and tomorrow look like and come up with such an impressive list.

Where’s my…? Oh, right; packed already.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll… No, I won’t.

What are all the things I’ve been putting off? Unless they can wait for 10 weeks, I have to do them all, now.

I never quite realized what a total mess my life was until I had to think about packing it up and hauling it over the Pacific.

Why is it that even the most expensive of electronic devices are rendered totally useless without something so trivial and easy-to-lose as a charger? And why can I find chargers to my Sony Walkman CD player and every long-since-trashed gadget, but none for any of these cameras? I can’t remember the last time I put them somewhere thinking, “Well, at least I’ll easily remember where I put this.” Now I’ve looked all the obvious places and can’t get to any of the obscure places under the chaotic mess I created while tearing apart my living spaces looking for the stupid thing.

I don’t think I’ve ever over-packed in my life, but somehow, I feel compelled to stuff everything I could conceivably need in in this suitcase. I’ve never thought, “I need some eye-drops right now,” and yet, there they are. In a shoe.

This suitcase looks like it was packed by a grown-up. Yikes. I mean “adult.” Grown-ups don’t refer to themselves as “grow-ups.”

I want to buy everything. I don’t know what’s behind this, other than this conviction that the more I purchase, the more prepared I must be.

I really hope this suitcase is going to zip shut. I’m afraid to try, because I’m afraid it won’t. Why does this remind me of applying to college? I need a nap.

Where’s my…? packed, damn it.  Ugh. Don’t say the “damn” word.

I want a hug.

Thanks to God, I had a great last American day. I had brunch and dessert with two awesome girls, went shopping with the brother for last minute airplane snacks and $1 Friends of the Library books, gushed with a newly engaged friend, finished packing the suitcase, and then went out to dinner for a friend’s birthday. It was the perfect combination of last-minute preparation and stocking up on the memories that I’ll miss while I’m gone. I couldn’t have arranged it better myself: I even got in some brief rants, visited the Apple Store, and got a chance to laugh so hard I couldn’t breathe. I’m nervous about leaving and anticipating all I’ll miss, but I think I’m finally ready to go; I did get lots of goodbye hugs, after all : )

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